It's Ending ... It's Beginning
So I will be really short on this one. The end of summer school happened three weeks ago. Tomorrow, I begin my fall semester. Last night I was stressed out beyond belief. My mind kept reeling about having only 32 hours--8 classes--to graduate. It's good news, and it's horrible news. I'm thrilled, but I'm nervous to the point of regulating the amount of food I have in my tum-tum.
Okay, not really. But I am hungry right now. Hunger's good, right? That means there is nothing just flat out laying on my stomach accumulating and spreading out on my already chunky body.
I said I was going to be short, right? I'll tell more later.
Labels: It Really Happened, Thoughts
Ten Things This Tuesday
Oh my goodness! Last week was interesting! I have to tell you what happened to me in this format!
If someone had told me that I would have done these ten things last week, I would have slapped them!
1. A friend of mine and I pulled over on the side of the road late at night to fix the blow out of a woman
2. who happened to be one of my sorority sisters that pledged me
3. and who is the mother of the current Miss Mississippi!
4. I was given a scholarship that had me in tears--only half of it is spent. Promise! (Okay, maybe more. I did put some of it away, though. Thank goodness I did. I was not expecting to have an amount due in the spring semester for some reason. Egad.)
5. I heard from an old friend,
6. a truck driver, who took me to Houston
7. and when we stopped at a truckers' gas station in Louisiana, I had the best etouffee I have ever tasted
8. and some alligator! (Felt like chicken, but not much of a taste. It was very lean, though.)
9. On the way back, I did some yoga stretching in the bed that was in the back of an 18-wheeler,
10. and I drove an 18-wheeler on the highway for almost 50 miles!
I Just Have to Put This out There
The reason I have relationships with only a few people is because I only go to people to help me and only a few people come to me to be sociable. The others come if they need something that I only I can help with or not associate themselves with me at all. Who knows. I'll elaborate later. I'm getting in a bad mood again. I'm going to have to find a place to do some reading.
Labels: Thoughts
A Daily OM Dose of Thought
Clinging To The Core
When Our World Falls Apart
There are times when our whole world seems to be falling apart around us, and we are not sure what to hold onto anymore. Sometimes our relationships crumble and sometimes it’s our physical environment. At other times, we can’t put our finger on it, but we feel as if all the walls have fallen down around us and we are standing with nothing to lean on, exposed and vulnerable. These are the times in our lives when we are given an opportunity to see where we have established our sense of identity, safety, and well-being. And while it is perfectly natural and part of our process to locate our sense of self in externals, any time those external factors shift, we have an opportunity to rediscover and move closer to our core, which is the only truly safe place to call home.
The core of our being is not affected by the shifting winds of circumstance or subject to the cycles of change that govern physical reality. It is as steady and consistent as the sun, which is why the great mystics and mystical poets often reference the sun in their odes to the self. Like the sun, there are times when our core seems to be inaccessible to us, but this is just a misperception. We know that when the sun goes behind a cloud or sets for the night, it has not disappeared but is simply temporarily out of sight. In the same way, we can trust that our inner core is always shining brightly, even when we cannot quite see it.
We can cling to this core when things around us are falling apart, knowing that an inexhaustible light shines from within ourselves. Times of external darkness can be a great gift in that they provide an opportunity to remember this inner light that shines regardless of the circumstances of our lives. When our external lives begin to come back together, we are able to lean a bit more lightly on the structures we used to call home, knowing more clearly than ever that our true home is that bright sun shining in our core.
Labels: Daily OM, Feel Goods
Somebody Hold Me Back
Ugh! People can be so rude! SCREAMING!
I went to a Japanese restaurant that had two sides--and two entrances. Mind you, it was the first time I had ever been there. I opened they door and two servers nearly pounced on me.
Listen, I'm Black. I'm accustomed to certain looks--like the one they gave me as if I either did not know how to eat Japanese food or I'm about to be rude and classless. I can even say that I might have asked for it. I was wearing some jeans, a "Big Dog' t-shirt, and my dreaded-looking hair can set some people aback. But they did not have to look at me as if I was going to fulfill their stereotypical expectations.
Anyway, I asked for a to-go menu so I can see what I wanted. I left, got my purse out of my trunk, and went back inside. I wanted to read and have some green tea, maybe order some sushi. One of the servers asked if I wanted hibachi or sushi. I told them sushi and he pointed to the entrance for the other side of the restaurant.
I wasn't going to tell him that this was my first time in that restaurant or that I didn't know there was a second entrance since I parked to where my vantage point only saw one entrance or that I did not understand him when they pointed in that direction the first time, because I'm considerate of people speaking second languages with their heavy accents, I swear I am. I've been trying to speak decent Spanish, but it's just not working. I digress. Again.
One step after I began to walk in the entrance's direction, one of the servers laughed. I continued to walk away. I knew he was laughing at me and not in a kind way, either. I let that slide.
Upon leaving. I went through the same doorway, and the same two male servers were there. One of them gave that head-nudging in my direction as he made a sound. I slowed down my walk so I could stare at that one guy so he would not forget my face and vice versa. I heard, "have a good evening," from the other guy. At a glance I saw a nasty smirk on his face. I stabbed a "truck you" (remember, this is a family blog) look at him, returned a salutation and left. I wanted to do something. Anything. As I was returning to campus, I thought about revenge. Lord, help me I thought and thought. It'll probably be my next Ten Things This Tuesday.
Labels: Humor, It Really Happened, Screaming, The Negatives
Life Goes On...
There are two types of people. I'm the type that sits back and waits for God to save me as the boats go by.
I've got some stuff I have to take care of and one thing that keeps running through my mind is John Cougar (you'll see why I'm using his middle name) Mellencamp's song, "Jack and Diane." Life goes on long after the thrill of living is gone.
I'm a slow reader, and I have 18 books that I have to read this semester. How does anyone do it? Not only that, but I can't focus when I do read. If I can focus, I don't comprehend much. I digress. I feel like I'm complaining when I should just start reading. I am working on George Eliot's Middlemarch by listening to it on CD. I'll let you know how I accomplish all of this.
Labels: It Really Happened, Thoughts
Ten Things This Tuesday
Why am I doing this right now when I should be getting ready for work? Who knows...
Ten t-shirts that I'm going to make one day:
1. "Am I crazy even if the voices in my head sound like me?"
2. "Will work for sushi."
3. "I want a hug."
4. "George Stephanopolous for President"
5. "Worry. I don't have it under control."
6. "I'm just happy to be here."
7. "Shhh! You're interrupting the voices in my head!"
8. "If you are reading this, I can tell where you are looking."
9. "It's people like me that keep the beauty continuum in balance."
10. "If you see me, tell me that I said, 'Hi.' "
Labels: Ten Things This Tuesday
My Summer Ended Today
I took my last final exam for the summer last night. Ever have the feeling that time is working against you? Well, I was truly against the gun when I was writing my blue book. I started talking about how reading Shakespeare was like untangling string. UNTANGLING STRING? SCREAMING! What the Sam Hill is my problem? I had so much information in front of me, but nothing to write about. I had an out-of-body experience. I can say that I came up with some interesting tidbits that the professor did not touch on, but still ... Afterwards, I had dinner with the guys. I was the only woman in a class with four men including the professor. He offered me a toast about being the only woman. I had to tell them, "the pleasure was all mine!" LOL I have to say that the other three guys were good looking in their own way, and the professor's cool, also. We drank southern pecan beer and ate pizza. We talked for a couple of hours, and I really enjoyed myself. I know I am stressing out for a reason. I don't expect an A out of the class, but it would be nice to get a decent grade--the class cost me $1650.
Okay. I'm going to go hurl now. ;)
Labels: It Really Happened, Screaming
