Is It Just Me? Please Tell Me It's Not Just Me...
Monday, June 19, 2006
"There is less in this than meets the eye."
----
Tallulah Brockman Bankhead
I’m a terribly sick person. My brain has many issues. The thoughts that go on in my head scare me sometimes to boisterous laughter.
Here’s one of them.
I was walking down the aisle of a grocery store minding my own business when I had this picture in my head. You see, an older woman who was wearing lovely white polyester pants was bent over behind her basket as her friend was talking to her. She was seeking out something on one of the lower shelves on her side of the aisle. Then it came to me out of nowhere. The picture of my bending my leg outward, bending my knee and kicking her. I pictured that, though my kick was gentle, it pushed her through the cart, which opened and the momentum of her falling into the cart pushed forward down the aisle until she ran into the dairy counter. The bags of shredded cheese and blocks of plastic-wrapped cheese would topple over her, and because there was some apparatus or torque or something, the shredded cheese was freed and she was in her cart smushing her groceries and topped with mild and sharp cheddar, mozzarella, Mexican mix cheeses like some type of lasagna. Moments later, yolks and whites of eggs oozed from under her.
Senior Citizen, four-cheese Omelet!
Told you I’m sick.
----
Tallulah Brockman Bankhead
I’m a terribly sick person. My brain has many issues. The thoughts that go on in my head scare me sometimes to boisterous laughter.
Here’s one of them.
I was walking down the aisle of a grocery store minding my own business when I had this picture in my head. You see, an older woman who was wearing lovely white polyester pants was bent over behind her basket as her friend was talking to her. She was seeking out something on one of the lower shelves on her side of the aisle. Then it came to me out of nowhere. The picture of my bending my leg outward, bending my knee and kicking her. I pictured that, though my kick was gentle, it pushed her through the cart, which opened and the momentum of her falling into the cart pushed forward down the aisle until she ran into the dairy counter. The bags of shredded cheese and blocks of plastic-wrapped cheese would topple over her, and because there was some apparatus or torque or something, the shredded cheese was freed and she was in her cart smushing her groceries and topped with mild and sharp cheddar, mozzarella, Mexican mix cheeses like some type of lasagna. Moments later, yolks and whites of eggs oozed from under her.
Senior Citizen, four-cheese Omelet!
Told you I’m sick.
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Comments for Is It Just Me? Please Tell Me It's Not Just Me...
Yeah, my hubby was bending over the other day and I thought of a swift kick as well!!!
Funny post!
-ellie
Funny post!
-ellie
- Posted at Mon Jun 19, 12:34:00 PM | By
EJL
You should have just foot-whacked him one! That'll teach him!!!!!
- Posted at Mon Jun 19, 05:02:00 PM | By Evolution of gina
Hmmm, is there something 'behind' this, maybe a white-polyester issue?
Funny, though not very appetizing, images!
Funny, though not very appetizing, images!
- Posted at Mon Jun 19, 06:13:00 PM | By
LOL ... I think you have an amazing and quick witted brain! I bet you are fun to be around!
- Posted at Tue Jun 20, 11:10:00 PM | By Mama Mouse