Ten Things This Tuesday
"Faith is to believe what we do not see; and the reward of this faith is to see what we believe."
-Saint Augustine
"America is not only big and rich, it is mysterious; and its capacity for the humorous or ironical concealment of its interests matches that of the legendary inscrutable Chinese."
- David Riesman
"Half of the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important."
- George (Pen name of Mary Ann Evans) Eliot
Oh, I am in rare form this morning. With only a few hours sleep, I nearly jumped out of bed with this one:
Ten things I do not want to hear in the public bathroom stall next to me:
1. In Tony Little (the infomercial muscle-bound, ponytailed blonde who sold the Gazelle—google him if you don’t know who I mean) voice, “YOU CAN DO IT!!!!”
2. “I’m a little teapot, short and stout…”
3. “Just ten more pounds to go!”
4. “Wow. Maybe I had just a little too much red cabbage, but boy that is such a lovely color purple…”
5. “Ahoy, matey!”
6. “Gosh, I hope I don’t break this one.”
7. “And they said, ‘with Beano, there’ll be no gas.’ Yeah, right!”
8. “Oh, my goodness. My water just broke!”
9. Someone singing, War’s “Why Can’t We Be Friends”
10. Someone singing, R Kelly’s“I Believe I Can Fly”
Labels: Humor, My Writing, Ten Things This Tuesday
