Dad Gum It!
Friday, March 30, 2007
"We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be." - Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
So, I had a long day, but what do I hate the most about it? Me.
I had two--count them, three!--opportunities to make it to Memphis to the Southern Writing Workshop. What do I do? I went to both my classes and I didn't have to and on top of that, I went back to my room between classes and--grrr, I could kick myself!--did nothing! I didn't pack, I didn't brush my teeth (I did that earlier)! Nothing! Well, I slept late for my first class and then I came back to my room after my first class and showered, but other than that, nothing!
I missed the conference, and on top of that, I should be reading, but what do I do? I plant my big back forty in front of a computer and the rest is history! What is the nature of self-sabotage? How can so many people avoid doing that and I not only let other people's suggestions sabotage me, I sabotage myself! I can be alone and BAM I divert my attentions another direction! (More to come later ...)
So, I had a long day, but what do I hate the most about it? Me.
I had two--count them, three!--opportunities to make it to Memphis to the Southern Writing Workshop. What do I do? I went to both my classes and I didn't have to and on top of that, I went back to my room between classes and--grrr, I could kick myself!--did nothing! I didn't pack, I didn't brush my teeth (I did that earlier)! Nothing! Well, I slept late for my first class and then I came back to my room after my first class and showered, but other than that, nothing!
I missed the conference, and on top of that, I should be reading, but what do I do? I plant my big back forty in front of a computer and the rest is history! What is the nature of self-sabotage? How can so many people avoid doing that and I not only let other people's suggestions sabotage me, I sabotage myself! I can be alone and BAM I divert my attentions another direction! (More to come later ...)
Labels: The Negatives, Thoughts
This I Believe
Thursday, March 29, 2007
"In depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer." - Albert Camus
I'm a big a fan of National Public Radio and some of the series that they do. This I Believe is one that comes on every Monday morning on Morning Edition. I've often thought about funny and serious essays that I wanted to submit. I don't know how often I will do this, but I want to submit some of the convictions that this series has inspired. Click on the title post or here to read some of the essays that have been read in the This I Believe series.
Every morning, I awaken subconsciously thinking that I have not touched another human being the day before. I often feel remiss about it. I know how emotionally sensitive I am. It's a simultaneous joy and albatross. I love being hugged and I love hugging. I often tell people that I'm a professional hugger. I learned this from my mother.
I thought about the most precious hugs that I received from her. After I left home, whenever I returned, I'd have to posture myself for her to give me her special hugs. Even as my mother's health had deteriorated, when my mother's legs began to fail supporting her more and more, I would have to get on my knees for her to hug me while she was seated. She was four or five inches shorter and much bigger than I was, but every time she hugged me, I would feel enclosed in the purest love I have ever experienced.
I am chuckling to myself. My mother was not a small woman. At around 5'3", her largest weight was over 300 pounds. In her embrace, I would be smothered by bosom as she wrapped her arms around me. She would rub a "sweet spot"--a place on my spine that is particularly sensitive because of my scoliosis, the curve in my back--and I was putty. When I hug people nowadays, I yearn for that special rub.
I believe in the power of touch. Of the five senses, touch is the sense that is directly impacted by implementing it on someone else. I believe touch is the more real than any of the others. The taste buds, ears, nose, and eyes can be tricked. The skin can be tricked also, but when my skin touches other people, something unique and beautiful happens.
I believe that very few things can make me feel better than a pat on my shoulder, a cheek against mine, a chest pressed against mine as hands softly pat or rub my back, holding hands, or a kiss on a cheek. I believe that a day without touching someone is a day remissed of a human connection.
I'm a big a fan of National Public Radio and some of the series that they do. This I Believe is one that comes on every Monday morning on Morning Edition. I've often thought about funny and serious essays that I wanted to submit. I don't know how often I will do this, but I want to submit some of the convictions that this series has inspired. Click on the title post or here to read some of the essays that have been read in the This I Believe series.
Every morning, I awaken subconsciously thinking that I have not touched another human being the day before. I often feel remiss about it. I know how emotionally sensitive I am. It's a simultaneous joy and albatross. I love being hugged and I love hugging. I often tell people that I'm a professional hugger. I learned this from my mother.
I thought about the most precious hugs that I received from her. After I left home, whenever I returned, I'd have to posture myself for her to give me her special hugs. Even as my mother's health had deteriorated, when my mother's legs began to fail supporting her more and more, I would have to get on my knees for her to hug me while she was seated. She was four or five inches shorter and much bigger than I was, but every time she hugged me, I would feel enclosed in the purest love I have ever experienced.
I am chuckling to myself. My mother was not a small woman. At around 5'3", her largest weight was over 300 pounds. In her embrace, I would be smothered by bosom as she wrapped her arms around me. She would rub a "sweet spot"--a place on my spine that is particularly sensitive because of my scoliosis, the curve in my back--and I was putty. When I hug people nowadays, I yearn for that special rub.
I believe in the power of touch. Of the five senses, touch is the sense that is directly impacted by implementing it on someone else. I believe touch is the more real than any of the others. The taste buds, ears, nose, and eyes can be tricked. The skin can be tricked also, but when my skin touches other people, something unique and beautiful happens.
I believe that very few things can make me feel better than a pat on my shoulder, a cheek against mine, a chest pressed against mine as hands softly pat or rub my back, holding hands, or a kiss on a cheek. I believe that a day without touching someone is a day remissed of a human connection.
Labels: Blog/Sites to See, Thoughts
Pointless Pic Post
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
"Are you bored with life? Then throw yourself into some work you believe in with all your heart, live for it, die for it, and you will find happiness that you had thought could never be yours."
- Dale Carnegie
- Dale Carnegie
Labels: Pics
Ten Things This Tuesday
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
"When a subject is highly controversial and any question about sex is that one cannot hope to tell the truth. One can only show how one came to hold whatever opinion one does hold." - Virginia Woolf
I'm not even sure where this one came from...
Ten things I'd like to read as headlines:
1. "Government Passes Bill to Not Spend Money in Ridiculous Manners"
2. "Gas Prices Keeps Record Low of $1.23 for Record 13 Months"
3. "FDA Approves Keep-Proportionate-Weight Pill"
4. "United States Ranks First in Science and Math for 11th Year"
5. "Gina Kohl Tops Fortune 500's Most Wonderfully Wealthy People"
6. "Economic Indicators Confirm Rich Getting Poorer, Poor Getting Richer; President's 'Age of Financial Conservatism' Affects Trend"
7. "Homeless People on Endangered Species List"
8. "World Peace 25 Years Later: A Look Back"
9. "Divorce Rate at 25% for Seventh Year Running"
10. "Final Troops from Iraq and Afghanistan Come Home; Middle East Thrive on Their Own"
I'm not even sure where this one came from...
Ten things I'd like to read as headlines:
1. "Government Passes Bill to Not Spend Money in Ridiculous Manners"
2. "Gas Prices Keeps Record Low of $1.23 for Record 13 Months"
3. "FDA Approves Keep-Proportionate-Weight Pill"
4. "United States Ranks First in Science and Math for 11th Year"
5. "Gina Kohl Tops Fortune 500's Most Wonderfully Wealthy People"
6. "Economic Indicators Confirm Rich Getting Poorer, Poor Getting Richer; President's 'Age of Financial Conservatism' Affects Trend"
7. "Homeless People on Endangered Species List"
8. "World Peace 25 Years Later: A Look Back"
9. "Divorce Rate at 25% for Seventh Year Running"
10. "Final Troops from Iraq and Afghanistan Come Home; Middle East Thrive on Their Own"
Labels: Ten Things This Tuesday
Not to be Outdone, a Response for a Consolation Prize--FOLLOW LINK BY CLICKING TITLE
Sunday, March 25, 2007
"The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function." - F. Scott Fitzgerald
For the first time in all of my days, I got a dressing down from blogging. In fact, I owe some writing to previous bidders that I've been neglecting. As I type this, I have a paper to write and two tests to study for (ergo my more sporadic writing last week). You'll notice that I did not "write" the last two blogs. I haven't even been able to give my consolation prize bloggers great reviews as of late.
I digress. I received a response from someone, MBA, who wrote the following (and I quote):
HELLO GINA, I-BIBLIOPHILE DESERVED A BETTER DESCRIPTION WHAT I FEEL, THE MOST IMPORTANT THING- ALL THE BOOKS MENTIONED AT I-BIBLIOPHILE LIBRARY ARE FREE DOWNLOADS. ALTHOUGH THE SPACE SEEMS CLUTTERED BUT LET US APPRECIATE THE HARDWORK BEHIND THAT. I ve seen so many blogs on books but the
best one is http://i-bibliophile.blogspot.com/
- easy to use blogdesign[for users]
- no. of books
- brilliant categorisation
- daily updated..
I'm a fan of i-bibliophile Library
Far be it for me to not take the information of someone else who knows more than I about something and not share. So, MBA, (can I just ask you to click on his link, so you can be as amazed about his blog as I am, please?) this is for you. I may see what I-Bibliophile can do for me.
If anyone has a problem with my description of them, they are welcome to tell me. The alternative is to not even do the consolation prize thing--something that is rarely done by other bloggers in the first place and it takes a lot of time and effort to do--but, you know how much I love you, right? My heart couldn't take giving you as much as I can every time I open it to you. (Geez, did that sound like I was a pimp?)
****************************************
I feel like I need to clarify something. I harbor no ill will towards anyone. I checked out I-Bibliofile to see what the blog can do for me. I found information on my essay that was very helpful. I even signed onto this service that is an online library access site. Hopefully this will clear up things. I-Bibliofile is a wonderful site for research. Try it out sometime.
Now I have to make some time for my cop-a-squater before she sends me a smackdown.
For the first time in all of my days, I got a dressing down from blogging. In fact, I owe some writing to previous bidders that I've been neglecting. As I type this, I have a paper to write and two tests to study for (ergo my more sporadic writing last week). You'll notice that I did not "write" the last two blogs. I haven't even been able to give my consolation prize bloggers great reviews as of late.
I digress. I received a response from someone, MBA, who wrote the following (and I quote):
HELLO GINA, I-BIBLIOPHILE DESERVED A BETTER DESCRIPTION WHAT I FEEL, THE MOST IMPORTANT THING- ALL THE BOOKS MENTIONED AT I-BIBLIOPHILE LIBRARY ARE FREE DOWNLOADS. ALTHOUGH THE SPACE SEEMS CLUTTERED BUT LET US APPRECIATE THE HARDWORK BEHIND THAT. I ve seen so many blogs on books but the
best one is http://i-bibliophile.blogspot.com/
- easy to use blogdesign[for users]
- no. of books
- brilliant categorisation
- daily updated..
I'm a fan of i-bibliophile Library
Far be it for me to not take the information of someone else who knows more than I about something and not share. So, MBA, (can I just ask you to click on his link, so you can be as amazed about his blog as I am, please?) this is for you. I may see what I-Bibliophile can do for me.
If anyone has a problem with my description of them, they are welcome to tell me. The alternative is to not even do the consolation prize thing--something that is rarely done by other bloggers in the first place and it takes a lot of time and effort to do--but, you know how much I love you, right? My heart couldn't take giving you as much as I can every time I open it to you. (Geez, did that sound like I was a pimp?)
****************************************
I feel like I need to clarify something. I harbor no ill will towards anyone. I checked out I-Bibliofile to see what the blog can do for me. I found information on my essay that was very helpful. I even signed onto this service that is an online library access site. Hopefully this will clear up things. I-Bibliofile is a wonderful site for research. Try it out sometime.
Now I have to make some time for my cop-a-squater before she sends me a smackdown.
Labels: Blog/Sites to See
Peculiar News Post--FOLLOW LINK BY CLICKING TITLE
Saturday, March 24, 2007
"No one has ever passed so few examinations as I have and received so many degrees." - Winston Churchill
New Jersey thieves snatch $12,000 in underwear
Three brazen New Jersey shoplifters made off with nearly $12,000 in women's underwear by stuffing the goods into bags designed to foil anti-theft equipment at a Victoria's Secret store while the shop was open for business, police said.
Surveillance cameras captured two men and one woman jamming undergarments into large bags and walking past customers and staff into the Newport Center Mall in Jersey City.
Police said the thieves took over $6,900 in panties and more than $4,900 in bras. Victoria's Secret bras retail from $30 to over $50. Panties cost between $5 and $20, according to the company's website.
No arrests have been made since the crime was reported Tuesday night, said Lt. Edgar Martinez, spokesman for the Jersey City police department.
"This isn't something we've seen before. It's a lot of underwear to take," said Martinez.
Pointless Pic Post--FOLLOW LINK BY CLICKING TITLE
Friday, March 23, 2007
"You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try."
- Beverly Sills
Ten Things This Tuesday
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
"Since we cannot know all that is to be known of everything, we ought to know a little about everything."- Blaise Pascal
Ten things that I just want to haul off and scream at them. Yup. Didn't take me long to get this one done. I almost wrote it yesterday...
1. Pizza is finger food.
2. So are hamburgers.
3. And french fries. Stop using your knives and forks to eat them, you idiot!
4. That funky, flimsy material that you threw on you this morning and got sucked up into the idea that it was stylish is frumpy on you.
5. And you need to wear a slip under it. It is not cute to have flimsy material bunch up on you there.
6. Your urine and fecal material are not anyone's gift to be shared. Flush the toilet.
7. Men, lift the seat before you pee, put it down afterwards. And don't give me that line that women don't have to lift and put down anything. I happen to always put my toilet seat and lid down.
8. If you are going to wear flip-flops, do us all a favor. Trim your toenails, moisturize your feet, and don't let them get too funky-smelling. Yuck.
9. Buy some dental floss, because I'm so sick and tired of seeing you with something between your teeth and then you have the nerve to get defensive when I tell you that you need floss.
10. Do not give me that fake smile. It's ugly and I'd rather not even be bothered with it. Just don't smile at me if you don't want to. I might get offended, but good grief, I'm more offended with that yucky smile. Honest.
Ten things that I just want to haul off and scream at them. Yup. Didn't take me long to get this one done. I almost wrote it yesterday...
1. Pizza is finger food.
2. So are hamburgers.
3. And french fries. Stop using your knives and forks to eat them, you idiot!
4. That funky, flimsy material that you threw on you this morning and got sucked up into the idea that it was stylish is frumpy on you.
5. And you need to wear a slip under it. It is not cute to have flimsy material bunch up on you there.
6. Your urine and fecal material are not anyone's gift to be shared. Flush the toilet.
7. Men, lift the seat before you pee, put it down afterwards. And don't give me that line that women don't have to lift and put down anything. I happen to always put my toilet seat and lid down.
8. If you are going to wear flip-flops, do us all a favor. Trim your toenails, moisturize your feet, and don't let them get too funky-smelling. Yuck.
9. Buy some dental floss, because I'm so sick and tired of seeing you with something between your teeth and then you have the nerve to get defensive when I tell you that you need floss.
10. Do not give me that fake smile. It's ugly and I'd rather not even be bothered with it. Just don't smile at me if you don't want to. I might get offended, but good grief, I'm more offended with that yucky smile. Honest.
Labels: Ten Things This Tuesday
Okay. Really Quick. Something I Have to Share with You.
Monday, March 19, 2007
"Never believe anything until it has been officially denied." - Claud Cockburn
I finally did it. I bought a bra. It's too late, though. The girls tried to hold on as long as they could, but gravity was pulling harder than the elasticity in my bras were pushing. And we know how the twins never look exactly alike? Well, I didn't expect them to--ahem--age differently. Let's just say that I've got arrows aiming at different directions. I couldn't believe that there was a bra that was $35! What would a bra at that price do, give the girls their daily horoscopes? I'm jus' sayin'.
I also bought a pair of pants that were just a little too tight and a little too short. The hem can be taken out, but I am hoping that they will force me to work out a little harder than I have been. Shhhh... Yes any working out would be more than what I'm doing. At least it's on my mind! When was the last time you did a sit up? Huh? And don't you dare say just a few minutes ago, dad gum you! I love you and all, but I'm not worth lying to! ;D
Hopefully, I will get to tell you about my uneventful spring break. I lived through it, and that's saying a lot for living the last week in a house that has three pets and I'm asthmatically allergic to them.
Okay, I've got stuff to read and learn and memorize and write. So, you know I'm about to go to bed, right?
I finally did it. I bought a bra. It's too late, though. The girls tried to hold on as long as they could, but gravity was pulling harder than the elasticity in my bras were pushing. And we know how the twins never look exactly alike? Well, I didn't expect them to--ahem--age differently. Let's just say that I've got arrows aiming at different directions. I couldn't believe that there was a bra that was $35! What would a bra at that price do, give the girls their daily horoscopes? I'm jus' sayin'.
I also bought a pair of pants that were just a little too tight and a little too short. The hem can be taken out, but I am hoping that they will force me to work out a little harder than I have been. Shhhh... Yes any working out would be more than what I'm doing. At least it's on my mind! When was the last time you did a sit up? Huh? And don't you dare say just a few minutes ago, dad gum you! I love you and all, but I'm not worth lying to! ;D
Hopefully, I will get to tell you about my uneventful spring break. I lived through it, and that's saying a lot for living the last week in a house that has three pets and I'm asthmatically allergic to them.
Okay, I've got stuff to read and learn and memorize and write. So, you know I'm about to go to bed, right?
Labels: Humor, It Really Happened
That Low-Down-Dirty Sap-Sucker...
Thursday, March 15, 2007
"We are not retreating - we are advancing in another direction." - General Douglas MacArthur
Remember Drew, the liar? Well, he keeps calling me, and I keep answering the phone. I actually deleted it and told myself that he could kiss my @&& from hip to hip and take a little snort from the crack. I just didn't care. He's a liar, and though I can forgive just about anything, I can't get past this. It wouldn't be so bad, but I can talk to him about everything. I've told him things--and I've told people this before--I don't even want to repeat to myself. So--someone shoot off my baby toe--when he called me dead in the middle of the night after he got off work, I answered the phone. Yes, he knew I was sleep; yes, I wanted to go back to sleep, but my dumb back forty stayed and talked to him.
Drew wants me to trust him again.
Not today. Tomorrow's not looking so hot, either.
Remember Drew, the liar? Well, he keeps calling me, and I keep answering the phone. I actually deleted it and told myself that he could kiss my @&& from hip to hip and take a little snort from the crack. I just didn't care. He's a liar, and though I can forgive just about anything, I can't get past this. It wouldn't be so bad, but I can talk to him about everything. I've told him things--and I've told people this before--I don't even want to repeat to myself. So--someone shoot off my baby toe--when he called me dead in the middle of the night after he got off work, I answered the phone. Yes, he knew I was sleep; yes, I wanted to go back to sleep, but my dumb back forty stayed and talked to him.
Drew wants me to trust him again.
Not today. Tomorrow's not looking so hot, either.
Labels: It Really Happened, My Opinion, The Negatives
Ten Things This Tuesday
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
"The deepest experience of the creator is feminine, for it is experience of receiving and bearing." - Rainer Maria Rilke
Hmmm... the end of the day and I have to own up to.
Ten things I shouldn't have done:
1. I shoudn't have awakened at 5:42 am after going to sleep around 2:30. I couldn't help it, but there it is. Then I got stupid, and looking back...
2. I shouldn't have exercised after waking up, but I actually woke up and thought that it would be great that I can start a new habit. Big mistake.
3. I shouldn't have worn a dress yesterday. It's a rare thing, but it was a beautiful morning, and I thought that I would do something pretty for myself. I regret the dress because I looked at those things, and why I did it is beyond me, but...
4. I shouldn't have put on those shoes! My feet hurt up to my calves! Seriously! I did not want to walk!
5. I shouldn't have felt like I was superwoman. I counted. I had gone up and down about 15 flights of stairs before 8am. I've been wanting to strengthen myself physically and lose weight. I should have known better. I should have known something was going on. My stupid, stupid body.
6. I shouldn't have forgotten that this week was eventually coming. Ladies, you know what I'm talking about. And by now, you guys should know, too.
7. I shouldn't have let her get to me. This abrasive-natured women irks me. I think about all of the work I wanted to accomplish at work this week, and she is bothering me. Petty stuff, I know, but petty just the same. Not even worth talking about. Now.
8. I shouldn't have bought that. No. I shouldn't have bought all of that stuff. I feel like I've spent a bunch of money and not much to show for it. I do that when I don't know what to do with myself and when I'm on ...well, you know. That number six thingie.
9. I shouldn't have thought about it. All of the work that I have to get done this week before classes start again. I just want a do-over.
10. I shouldn't have fallen asleep earlier. I went to see my play cousin at the hospital. (Why did almost everyone at my job freak out when I called her "my play cousin"? Nobody's ever had two families that were so close that the pretended that they were related? Sheesh!) She was so exhausted that I just told her to be quiet while I did some reading. After one page of Matthew Arnold's bio, I was gone. I've been dreading this class. I want to drop it so badly, but I also just want to not give up. Heck, I might just audit it. What's the worst that could happen? Not much, except that my professor, who also is my advisor, will rip a new hole in me. Oh well.
Hmmm... the end of the day and I have to own up to.
Ten things I shouldn't have done:
1. I shoudn't have awakened at 5:42 am after going to sleep around 2:30. I couldn't help it, but there it is. Then I got stupid, and looking back...
2. I shouldn't have exercised after waking up, but I actually woke up and thought that it would be great that I can start a new habit. Big mistake.
3. I shouldn't have worn a dress yesterday. It's a rare thing, but it was a beautiful morning, and I thought that I would do something pretty for myself. I regret the dress because I looked at those things, and why I did it is beyond me, but...
4. I shouldn't have put on those shoes! My feet hurt up to my calves! Seriously! I did not want to walk!
5. I shouldn't have felt like I was superwoman. I counted. I had gone up and down about 15 flights of stairs before 8am. I've been wanting to strengthen myself physically and lose weight. I should have known better. I should have known something was going on. My stupid, stupid body.
6. I shouldn't have forgotten that this week was eventually coming. Ladies, you know what I'm talking about. And by now, you guys should know, too.
7. I shouldn't have let her get to me. This abrasive-natured women irks me. I think about all of the work I wanted to accomplish at work this week, and she is bothering me. Petty stuff, I know, but petty just the same. Not even worth talking about. Now.
8. I shouldn't have bought that. No. I shouldn't have bought all of that stuff. I feel like I've spent a bunch of money and not much to show for it. I do that when I don't know what to do with myself and when I'm on ...well, you know. That number six thingie.
9. I shouldn't have thought about it. All of the work that I have to get done this week before classes start again. I just want a do-over.
10. I shouldn't have fallen asleep earlier. I went to see my play cousin at the hospital. (Why did almost everyone at my job freak out when I called her "my play cousin"? Nobody's ever had two families that were so close that the pretended that they were related? Sheesh!) She was so exhausted that I just told her to be quiet while I did some reading. After one page of Matthew Arnold's bio, I was gone. I've been dreading this class. I want to drop it so badly, but I also just want to not give up. Heck, I might just audit it. What's the worst that could happen? Not much, except that my professor, who also is my advisor, will rip a new hole in me. Oh well.
Labels: Ten Things This Tuesday, The Negatives
I'm Going to Stop with the Peanut-Butter Spoons before Bedtime.
Sunday, March 11, 2007
"Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window." - Steve Wozniak
Good Grief, Charlie Brown! I gotta stop using that stuff that I've been using to go to sleep!
I dreamed I was in France. That was a nightmare as it was seeing though the French language is one of the worst romance languages in the world to me. I'm taking Spanish for a reason.
I digress.
I was on a trip with a bunch of other people (I'm hoping that this means that I will eventually get to go to Costa Rica to practice my Spanish SOON!) and a couple of friends and I decided to go sight-seeing. Now the part that was very vivid to me was that this very smart woman and I went somewhere. A French woman walked by. A stranger literally tripped her. She fell down some steps of what looked like a subway and ended on a landing. The classmate (who shall now be named Mary) went to her, helped her up, and the French woman looked at her and spat at her or something. Then she rubbed the place where Mary touched her, spat at it, and tried to rub it off. Then she said something in French. I didn't understand it, but all of the sudden I saw English subtitles! That French heifer was prejudiced and called Mary some very ugly names because Mary was Black! The heifer went on her way, but before she got too far, I grabbed her arm, dragged her around from behind this half-wall back to the stairs and threw her down even further! Mary and I looked at each other and I told her, "Run!" We peeled off in separate directions. I was lost, but I also disappeared from any authorities. Suddenly a suspicious-looking man appeared to be following me. I ran and screamed, "Help me! I am an American!" repeatedly. I ended up in some kind of Chinatown area (of France? Get out of town! I know!!!) and not only did they not understand French, but they didn't understand English! I was running and running as the man was catching up with me. I turned a corner, and looked behind me. He was not there. Suddenly, I heard a truck. I turned around, and these two men were in the truck. The driver had the guy who was chasing me by the throat. I walked to the chaser, and boy, I was looking really smug when I woke up!
I'm going to relieve some of my stress. Time to study some Spanish grammar and Brit Lit!
Good Grief, Charlie Brown! I gotta stop using that stuff that I've been using to go to sleep!
I dreamed I was in France. That was a nightmare as it was seeing though the French language is one of the worst romance languages in the world to me. I'm taking Spanish for a reason.
I digress.
I was on a trip with a bunch of other people (I'm hoping that this means that I will eventually get to go to Costa Rica to practice my Spanish SOON!) and a couple of friends and I decided to go sight-seeing. Now the part that was very vivid to me was that this very smart woman and I went somewhere. A French woman walked by. A stranger literally tripped her. She fell down some steps of what looked like a subway and ended on a landing. The classmate (who shall now be named Mary) went to her, helped her up, and the French woman looked at her and spat at her or something. Then she rubbed the place where Mary touched her, spat at it, and tried to rub it off. Then she said something in French. I didn't understand it, but all of the sudden I saw English subtitles! That French heifer was prejudiced and called Mary some very ugly names because Mary was Black! The heifer went on her way, but before she got too far, I grabbed her arm, dragged her around from behind this half-wall back to the stairs and threw her down even further! Mary and I looked at each other and I told her, "Run!" We peeled off in separate directions. I was lost, but I also disappeared from any authorities. Suddenly a suspicious-looking man appeared to be following me. I ran and screamed, "Help me! I am an American!" repeatedly. I ended up in some kind of Chinatown area (of France? Get out of town! I know!!!) and not only did they not understand French, but they didn't understand English! I was running and running as the man was catching up with me. I turned a corner, and looked behind me. He was not there. Suddenly, I heard a truck. I turned around, and these two men were in the truck. The driver had the guy who was chasing me by the throat. I walked to the chaser, and boy, I was looking really smug when I woke up!
I'm going to relieve some of my stress. Time to study some Spanish grammar and Brit Lit!
Labels: It Really Happened
Oh My Goodness, I Had a Dream!
Saturday, March 10, 2007
"If all men knew what others say of them, there would not be four friends in the world." - Blaise Pascal
I had a dream this afternoon. I must be stressed out as I don't know what. I pray that this was not a "this is going to happen to you in your future" dream. As bad as it was, I hope it was a stress dream.
Okay, you know how you take a nap while something is on television? I fell asleep to a radio program. A medical radio program. Egad. I will not do THAT again.
It started off with my living in a small house that was a shack. I lived in only a part of that house because of how my nature is: deal instead of change. It was a rental and apparently the landlord felt that, since I was living in only one part of the house, he or she could put in another family. Maybe because I did something to them, maybe because the landlord can get more money, who knows. My ex-roommate was a part of my dream. (SCREAMING! SCREAMING I TELL YOU! THAT BOBBLE-HEADED, DENSE HEFFA! SCREAMING!!!!) She represented the woman who was on the radio program that had a problem with her nerves or something. Of course, I did not believe my ex-roommate.
I was very tense. I did not feel comfortable with these people--I think they represented my ex-roommate's family. Slowly, each one of them turned against me. One of the little girls in the family wanted to comb my (and I don't know how this happened) luxuriously long hair. She was combing and stopping for a long time. I didn't understand why until I felt the need to touch my hair. Almost all of the side was gone. I got defensive, and I think I had a notion to kill that child. We fought (all of the sudden, she had incredible strength) for the scissors. I eventually took them out of my hand, and that's when the family, about five of them, started to circle around me. I thrashed the scissors this way and that, defending myself and giving them the thought that I would stab them.
Eventually, I did the coolest thing. At the door jamb, I looked at each one of them, and Gina the Warrior Princess, threw the scissors into a wall, stabbing them into it. My dream--uhmm, nightmare--faded away after that, and I woke up.
Thank goodness!
I had a dream this afternoon. I must be stressed out as I don't know what. I pray that this was not a "this is going to happen to you in your future" dream. As bad as it was, I hope it was a stress dream.
Okay, you know how you take a nap while something is on television? I fell asleep to a radio program. A medical radio program. Egad. I will not do THAT again.
It started off with my living in a small house that was a shack. I lived in only a part of that house because of how my nature is: deal instead of change. It was a rental and apparently the landlord felt that, since I was living in only one part of the house, he or she could put in another family. Maybe because I did something to them, maybe because the landlord can get more money, who knows. My ex-roommate was a part of my dream. (SCREAMING! SCREAMING I TELL YOU! THAT BOBBLE-HEADED, DENSE HEFFA! SCREAMING!!!!) She represented the woman who was on the radio program that had a problem with her nerves or something. Of course, I did not believe my ex-roommate.
I was very tense. I did not feel comfortable with these people--I think they represented my ex-roommate's family. Slowly, each one of them turned against me. One of the little girls in the family wanted to comb my (and I don't know how this happened) luxuriously long hair. She was combing and stopping for a long time. I didn't understand why until I felt the need to touch my hair. Almost all of the side was gone. I got defensive, and I think I had a notion to kill that child. We fought (all of the sudden, she had incredible strength) for the scissors. I eventually took them out of my hand, and that's when the family, about five of them, started to circle around me. I thrashed the scissors this way and that, defending myself and giving them the thought that I would stab them.
Eventually, I did the coolest thing. At the door jamb, I looked at each one of them, and Gina the Warrior Princess, threw the scissors into a wall, stabbing them into it. My dream--uhmm, nightmare--faded away after that, and I woke up.
Thank goodness!
Labels: It Really Happened
A Daily OM Dose of Thought
Friday, March 09, 2007
"People generally quarrel because they cannot argue."- Gilbert K. Chesterton
Shifting into Gratitude
The Question of Worthiness
We all know what it's like to finally get something we want, only to find ourselves feeling as if we don't deserve it. Whether it's a car, a new job, or a date with someone wonderful, we suddenly feel as if we are not up to it. Something in us wants to reject this gift from the universe, perhaps because it requires that we think of ourselves in a new way or makes us question why we should have something that others don't have. If these feelings of unworthiness are not consciously acknowledged, they can lead us to sabotage ourselves out of the gift being offered. Perhaps the best way to avoid rejection and sabotage is to simply shift into a state of gratitude, bypassing the question of worthiness altogether.
The question of whether we or anyone else deserves something is not really in our jurisdiction. These themes play themselves out in ways we can't fully comprehend-on the level of the soul, over the course of many lifetimes. What we do know is that the universe has its own way of shifting the balance over the course of time so that all things are ultimately fair. We can trust in this process and understand that when a gift comes our way, it is because we are meant to have it. Otherwise, it would not be available to us. Accepting the gift with gratitude and using it to the best of our ability is true humility.
When we receive a gift and find that feelings of unworthiness crop up, we can simply acknowledge the feelings and then remind ourselves that they are beside the point. We might say to ourselves, "I am meant to have this." As we allow ourselves to accept the gift, we might feel tenderness in our hearts that naturally shifts into a deep feeling of gratitude. As we sit for a moment, consciously holding the gift in our hands or in our hearts, we say "yes" to the universe's many blessings, and we also say "thank you."
Shifting into Gratitude
The Question of Worthiness
We all know what it's like to finally get something we want, only to find ourselves feeling as if we don't deserve it. Whether it's a car, a new job, or a date with someone wonderful, we suddenly feel as if we are not up to it. Something in us wants to reject this gift from the universe, perhaps because it requires that we think of ourselves in a new way or makes us question why we should have something that others don't have. If these feelings of unworthiness are not consciously acknowledged, they can lead us to sabotage ourselves out of the gift being offered. Perhaps the best way to avoid rejection and sabotage is to simply shift into a state of gratitude, bypassing the question of worthiness altogether.
The question of whether we or anyone else deserves something is not really in our jurisdiction. These themes play themselves out in ways we can't fully comprehend-on the level of the soul, over the course of many lifetimes. What we do know is that the universe has its own way of shifting the balance over the course of time so that all things are ultimately fair. We can trust in this process and understand that when a gift comes our way, it is because we are meant to have it. Otherwise, it would not be available to us. Accepting the gift with gratitude and using it to the best of our ability is true humility.
When we receive a gift and find that feelings of unworthiness crop up, we can simply acknowledge the feelings and then remind ourselves that they are beside the point. We might say to ourselves, "I am meant to have this." As we allow ourselves to accept the gift, we might feel tenderness in our hearts that naturally shifts into a deep feeling of gratitude. As we sit for a moment, consciously holding the gift in our hands or in our hearts, we say "yes" to the universe's many blessings, and we also say "thank you."
Foo Foo on You, Too!
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
"Nothing is so strong as gentleness and nothing is so gentle as real strength." - Ralph W. Sockman
I AM SUCH AN IDIOT! Please excuse me. I am. I am an idiot. I have been back here to respond to my posts. I even posted another post. I'm a dork, and I should be spanked (not like THAT, dutchy)! I did not tell you about The Foo Logs.
Now don't look at me like that, dad gum it. this is the Foo's baby picture--he said it, not me. In retrospect, I've dated men who were uglier on the inside, so don't knock this pic until you've tried it.
His self-description of his blog is, "A blog about life, technology, sport, and just about everything else." He means it. This Brit is in the States with a wonderful wife (so I'm told yet again). I've accepted his bid not only because he was the first in line, but he is a previous bidder. Which proves one thing: I try to honor my process about bidding.
I really want to tell you what his blog is about, but if I point you to one post, it may be gone in a few days. He posts often, and his subjects vary. That said, at the moment this post caught my eye. I insist--absolutely insist--that you take a peekaboo at it. Just watch it, it's simply amazing! While you are there, go to his home page. I've already put the link on the picture and in the post. What more do you want? Fine, I'll connect the link to this sentence. I've sure got you people spoiled, but you know how much I love you, right?Okay. I'm done. Scoot! Go! Click on this linkiepoo! I promise I will be here when you get back. Honest.
Labels: Blog/Sites to See
Ten Things This Tuesday
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
"Show me a good and gracious loser, and I'll show you a failure." - Knute Rockne
I came to my room after my last mid-term exam and, as I locked the door, it hit me.
Ten things I'm going to do for Spring Break:
1. Fly to Las Vegas and see my good friend, Celine Dion. We go way back.
2. Finish off my condo in Manhattan. Should my granite countertops be sky blue or robin's egg blue?
3. Deny Brad Pitt another hot, sweaty week of constant lovemaking. Again.
4. Slap some sense into Bush. Never mind. It hasn't been working all this time.
5. Give Steven Spielberg another idea about a movie.
6. Coach Tom Hanks. Again. He's so needy.
7. Try to help out Jennifer Hudson find her fashion sense. Gold lame' at the Oscars? Geez. I tried to tell her...
8. Spend a day in my yacht off the coast of... well, I'd rather not say. I would like one day of privacy.
9. Play a couple of games with Federer. I have to keep him humble.
10. Also deny Brian J. White. Again.
Okay, so ten things I won't be doing on Spring Break. So sue me.
I came to my room after my last mid-term exam and, as I locked the door, it hit me.
Ten things I'm going to do for Spring Break:
1. Fly to Las Vegas and see my good friend, Celine Dion. We go way back.
2. Finish off my condo in Manhattan. Should my granite countertops be sky blue or robin's egg blue?
3. Deny Brad Pitt another hot, sweaty week of constant lovemaking. Again.
4. Slap some sense into Bush. Never mind. It hasn't been working all this time.
5. Give Steven Spielberg another idea about a movie.
6. Coach Tom Hanks. Again. He's so needy.
7. Try to help out Jennifer Hudson find her fashion sense. Gold lame' at the Oscars? Geez. I tried to tell her...
8. Spend a day in my yacht off the coast of... well, I'd rather not say. I would like one day of privacy.
9. Play a couple of games with Federer. I have to keep him humble.
10. Also deny Brian J. White. Again.
Okay, so ten things I won't be doing on Spring Break. So sue me.
Labels: Humor, Ten Things This Tuesday
Consolation Prize for My Other Bidders
Monday, March 05, 2007
"Showing up is eighty percent of life." - Woody Allen
Okay, I already feel bad about one of my bidders--you know who you are--but the person that won the bid was the earliest previous bidder. I'm delighted to have him and horribly regret having to turn down the following fabulous blogs. Now you guys save me from offending any of these guys and give them a click. I'm procrastinating from studying for a test right now, so I'm going to give details later.
I-Bibliophile Library--Free for All -At the moment, there is so much stuff on it, that I honestly cannot tell you what this is about. I think the primary purpose of this place is to offer good books. One can click on them and purchase them through Amazon. I'm a slow reader so I take a 30-second overview on blogs. That said, when you have a chance to do some leisurely browsing--this person uses every inch of blogspace possible--please click on it. You may find a bargain.
Asara's Mental Meanderings Seven words: Wierd Al Yankovick and Donny Osmond's dancing. I'm beyond pain. I'm at the library right now and I want to laugh so hard. I know that I'm causing some horrible detriment to my body, because I'm hurting. Click on Asara's blog and scroll a smidge. Oh my heavenly stars.
Okay, I already feel bad about one of my bidders--you know who you are--but the person that won the bid was the earliest previous bidder. I'm delighted to have him and horribly regret having to turn down the following fabulous blogs. Now you guys save me from offending any of these guys and give them a click. I'm procrastinating from studying for a test right now, so I'm going to give details later.
I-Bibliophile Library--Free for All -At the moment, there is so much stuff on it, that I honestly cannot tell you what this is about. I think the primary purpose of this place is to offer good books. One can click on them and purchase them through Amazon. I'm a slow reader so I take a 30-second overview on blogs. That said, when you have a chance to do some leisurely browsing--this person uses every inch of blogspace possible--please click on it. You may find a bargain.
Asara's Mental Meanderings Seven words: Wierd Al Yankovick and Donny Osmond's dancing. I'm beyond pain. I'm at the library right now and I want to laugh so hard. I know that I'm causing some horrible detriment to my body, because I'm hurting. Click on Asara's blog and scroll a smidge. Oh my heavenly stars.
The Dutch Files (CONTAINS STRONG ADULT LANGUAGE) First of all, I love this woman. When I copped a squat in her square, she gave me the most loving post I had ever had. I feel HORRIBLE that I was not able to put her in my roses. She's in my blog links list and I often go there when I want a laugh. Give her a click. I don't even have to say please for her: either you will, and have a jolly good time, or you won't, and you will truly miss out.
Please give them a click. I promise I will be here when you get back! Honest.
Labels: Blog/Sites to See
Quirky Quote
Sunday, March 04, 2007
"It was when I found out I could make mistakes that I knew I was on to something." - Ornette Coleman
Okay, now I'm going to bed.
Okay, now I'm going to bed.
Labels: Feel Goods, Humor, Quotes
My 250th Post and It's about What?
"Solitude is a good place to visit but a poor place to stay." - Josh Billings
Liars. This post is about liars.
Why am I awake at this hour? I'm mad. I'm angry. No. Really angry.
So, I have a friend that I've talked to on and off for a few years now. I liked him. I really liked him. He and I had a good "relationship" such as it was. It protected me from acquiring a real life relationship and it also helped me to avoid knowing that any man worth having that saw me would consider having a relationship with me. I'd say, "Nope, I'm kind of in the middle of something," or say to myself, "I don't have to worry about any man trying to have a relationship with me because they don't find me attractive and, anyway, I'm in a 'kind of middle of something' kind of thing."
I'm not making much sense, I know, but consider the time that I made this post. Who would?
I digress.
This friend of mine, I'll call him Drew, just told me something about himself that made me question everything that he said. He told the truth about something he'd been lying about for years--I mean ever since I knew him. I mean we've been friends, we've had emotional ties to each other, we've gone as far as said the "L" word to each other, it's been like that.
This thing that Drew told me, though, has pissed me off. You know how people lie about small things here and there? Well, that's the kind of person he is, but since he and I were so far away from each other, it didn't--heck, it doesn't--matter. I haven't been an angel, either. I've lied to him a few times, but my lies and his lies are like stacking a piece of paper against a tree. (Hey, that's a pretty good one! I'll have to remember that!)
Tonight, he called me about 2:20am and we got into this conversation which--and why was I trying to hold this back for, I don't know--I told him exactly how I felt. I told Drew that I didn't know what made me angrier, his five-year-old lie or that he's been lying for about four years.
The one thing about liars? It hit me like a ton of bricks--liars are empowered when they lie and weaken the people they lie to. They empower themselves by knowing that the truth is something they know, but the lied-to person does not know. It gives them a one-upper, if you will. I feel manipulated and weakened and I am mad as dirt about it.
So right now, I am awake. Awake enough to consider taking a walk in the middle of the night. If it were a little warmer, I would not be posting this. Goodness knows I need to be walking or reading or something besides typing. I know how I will fix this anger-crusted insomnia.
The Merchant of Venice. Good night.
Liars. This post is about liars.
Why am I awake at this hour? I'm mad. I'm angry. No. Really angry.
So, I have a friend that I've talked to on and off for a few years now. I liked him. I really liked him. He and I had a good "relationship" such as it was. It protected me from acquiring a real life relationship and it also helped me to avoid knowing that any man worth having that saw me would consider having a relationship with me. I'd say, "Nope, I'm kind of in the middle of something," or say to myself, "I don't have to worry about any man trying to have a relationship with me because they don't find me attractive and, anyway, I'm in a 'kind of middle of something' kind of thing."
I'm not making much sense, I know, but consider the time that I made this post. Who would?
I digress.
This friend of mine, I'll call him Drew, just told me something about himself that made me question everything that he said. He told the truth about something he'd been lying about for years--I mean ever since I knew him. I mean we've been friends, we've had emotional ties to each other, we've gone as far as said the "L" word to each other, it's been like that.
This thing that Drew told me, though, has pissed me off. You know how people lie about small things here and there? Well, that's the kind of person he is, but since he and I were so far away from each other, it didn't--heck, it doesn't--matter. I haven't been an angel, either. I've lied to him a few times, but my lies and his lies are like stacking a piece of paper against a tree. (Hey, that's a pretty good one! I'll have to remember that!)
Tonight, he called me about 2:20am and we got into this conversation which--and why was I trying to hold this back for, I don't know--I told him exactly how I felt. I told Drew that I didn't know what made me angrier, his five-year-old lie or that he's been lying for about four years.
The one thing about liars? It hit me like a ton of bricks--liars are empowered when they lie and weaken the people they lie to. They empower themselves by knowing that the truth is something they know, but the lied-to person does not know. It gives them a one-upper, if you will. I feel manipulated and weakened and I am mad as dirt about it.
So right now, I am awake. Awake enough to consider taking a walk in the middle of the night. If it were a little warmer, I would not be posting this. Goodness knows I need to be walking or reading or something besides typing. I know how I will fix this anger-crusted insomnia.
The Merchant of Venice. Good night.
Labels: Calls for Response, My Opinion, The Negatives, Thoughts
Pointless Pic Post
Saturday, March 03, 2007
"When we long for life without difficulties, remind us that oaks grow strong in contrary winds and diamonds are made under pressure."
- PeterMarshall
Labels: Pics